Lotus Enthusiasts Organization (LEO) Drive on April 25 in Milford NJ

[Croc]

The LEO Group has organized what they call the annual fish and chip run in Milford NJ for Sunday April 25. I have done this before and it is a great time. This would be ideal for Bruce but I bet you will not be back from Bonaire.

 

Message from Lotus Talk Board:

 

2010 Lotus Fish and Chips Run (East Coast)

Yes, in spite of all the snow on the ground, spring is just around the corner and that means the Sixth Annual Lotus Fish and Chips Run!

 

This year's event will be on Sunday April 25th. We will meet at our usual spot at the municipal lot in the center of Milford N.J. at 12:00 pm (noon). After a scenic drive some of the regions most picturesque roads, we will return to the lot and walk across the street to The Ship Inn (

The Ship Inn

) to sample some of the excellent British cuisine.

 

There is an RSVP need but post here I will cross post it to Lotus Talk

[BruceBowker]

Would LOVE to do this but won't be back until June 6th. Oh for a private jet.

 

Any chance the annual event can be moved to June next time? Or we can just have our own event as last year.

[S1Steve]

Sorry I'll have to miss that run, I'll be in London.

[Croc]

Would LOVE to do this but won't be back until June 6th. Oh for a private jet.

 

Any chance the annual event can be moved to June next time? Or we can just have our own event as last year.

 

 

Can I borrow your private jet? Pretty please! :jester:

 

 

Unfortunately, I do not organize the event so it will not be moved - it is always in the last week of April. So we can always have our own event - probably better anyway - less people for you to buy beers for!

[Croc]

Sorry I'll have to miss that run, I'll be in London.

 

Well in that case, here is a useful guide to assist you when in the "Mother Country":

 

Completely Factual Guide for Americans Visiting Britain

 

Vocabulary

 

The Brits have peculiar words for many things. Money is referred to

as "goolies" in slang, so you should for instance say "I'd love to come

to the pub but I haven't got any goolies". "Quid" is the modern word for

what was once called a "shilling" -- the equivalent of seventeen cents

American. Underpants are called "wellies" and friends are called

"tossers." If you are fond of someone, you should tell him he is a "great

tosser" -- he will be touched. The English are a notoriously

demonstrative, tactile people, and if you want to fit in you should hold

hands with your acquaintances and tossers when you walk down the street.

Public nuzzling and licking are also encouraged, but only between people

of the same sex.

 

Habits

 

Ever since their Tory government wholeheartedly embraced full

union with Europe, the Brits have been attempting to adopt certain

continental customs, such as the large midday meal followed by a two- or three-hour

siesta , which they call a "wank." As this is still a fairly new practice

in Britain, it is not uncommon for people to oversleep (alarm clocks,

alas, do not work there due to the magnetic pull from Greenwich). If you

are late for supper, simply apologize and explain that you were having a

wank -- everyone will understand and forgive you.

 

Universities

 

University archives and manuscript collections are still governed

by quaint medieval rules retained out of respect for tradition; hence

patrons are expected to bring to the reading rooms their own ink-pots and

a small knife for sharpening their pens. Observing these customs will

signal the librarians that you are "in the know" -- one of the inner

circle, as it were, for the rules are unwritten and not posted anywhere

in the library. Likewise, it is customary to kiss the librarian on both

cheeks when he brings a manuscript you've requested, a practice dating

back to the reign of Henry VI.

 

One of the most delighful ways to spend an afternoon in Oxford or

Cambridge is gliding gently down the river in one of their flat-bottomed

boats, which you propel using a long pole. This is known as "cottaging."

Many of the boats (called "yer-I-nals") are privately owned by the

colleges, but there are some places that rent them to the public by the

hour. Just tell a professor or policeman that you are interested in

doing some cottaging and would like to know where the public yerinals are.

The poles must be treated with vegetable oil to protect them from the water,

so it's a good idea to buy a can of Crisco and have it on you when you

ask directions to the yerinals. That way people will know you are an

experienced cottager.

 

 

 

Food

 

British cuisine enjoys a well deserved reputation as the most

sublime gastronomic pleasure available to man. Thanks to today's robust

dollar, the American traveller can easily afford to dine out several

times a week (rest assured that a British meal is worth interrupting your

afternoon wank for). Few foreigners are aware that there are several

grades of meat in the UK. The best cuts of meat, like the best bottles of

gin, bear Her Majesty's seal, called the British Stamp of Excellence

(BSE). When you go to a fine restaurant, tell your waiter you want BSE

beef and won't settle for anything less. If he balks at your request,

custom dictates that you jerk your head imperiously back and forth while

rolling your eyes to show him who is boss. Once the waiter realizes you

are a person of discriminating taste, he may offer to let you peruse the

restaurant's list of exquisite British wines. If he doesn't, you should

order one anyway. The best wine grapes grow on the steep, chalky

hillsides of Yorkshire and East Anglia -- try an Ely '84 or Ripon '88 for a

rare treat indeed. When the bill for your meal comes it will show a suggested

amount. Pay whatever you think is fair, unless you plan to dine there

again, in which case you should simply walk out; the restaurant host will

understand that he should run a tab for you.

[Croc]

Part 2 of the guide

 

Transportation

 

Public taxis are subsidized by the Her Majesty's Government. A

taxi ride in London costs two pounds, no matter how far you travel. If a

taxi driver tries to overcharge you, you should yell "I think not, you

charlatan!", then grab the nearest bobby and have the driver arrested. It

is rarely necessary to take a taxi, though, since bus drivers are

required to make detours at patrons' requests. Just board any bus, pay your

fare of thruppence (the heavy gold-colored coins are "pence"), and state your

destination clearly to the driver, e.g.: "Please take me to the British

Library." A driver will frequently try to have a bit of harmless fun by

pretending he doesn't go to your requested destination. Ignore him, as he

is only teasing the American tourist (little does he know you're not so

ignorant!).

 

Speaking of the British Library, you should know that it has

recently moved to a new location at Kew. Kew is a small fishing village

in Wales. It can be reached by taking the train to Cardiff; once there, ask

any local about the complimentary shuttle bus to Kew. (Don't forget that

buses are called "prams" in England, and trains are called

"bumbershoots"--it's a little confusing at first. Motorcycles are called

"lorries" and the hospital, for reasons unknown, is called the

"off-license." It's also very important to know that a "doctor" only

means a PhD in England, not a physician. If you want a physician, you must

ask for an "MP" (which stands for "master physician").

 

For those travelling on a shoestring budget, the London Tube may

be the most economical way to get about, especially if you are a woman.

Chivalry is alive and well in Britain, and ladies still travel for free

on the Tube. Simply take some tokens from the baskets at the base of the

escalators or on the platforms; you will find one near any of the

state-sponsored Tube musicians. Once on the platform, though, beware!

Approaching trains sometimes disurb the large Gappe bats that roost in

the tunnels. The Gappes were smuggled into London in the early 19th century

by French saboteurs and have proved impossible to exterminate. The

announcement "Mind the Gappe!" is a signal that you should grab your hair

and look towards the ceiling. Very few people have ever been killed by

Gappes, though, and they are considered only a minor drawback to an

otherwise excellent means of transportation. (If you have difficulty

locating the Tube station, merely follow the signs that say "Subway" and

ask one of the full-time attendants where you can catch the bumbershoot.)

 

One final note: for preferential treatment when you arrive at

Heathrow airport, announce that you are a member of Shin Fane (an

international Jewish peace organization -- the "shin" stands for

"shalom"). As savvy travellers know, this little white lie will assure

you priority treatment as you make your way through customs; otherwise you

could waste all day in line. You might, in fact, want to ask a customs

agent to put a Shin Fane stamp in your passport, as it will expedite

things on your return trip.

 

Bollocks to your mum! ("farewell and good health to your family")

[S1Steve]

Good advice Mike !!!! LOL, Your not right Mate !!!!!

[Boxologist]

i will be staying local (autoX) that date. I will update the regional schedule later today.

[Croc]

Due to uncooperative weather expected for this weekend, the Fish and Chips Run has been postponed to Sunday May 16. Meeting time and place remains the same.

[Croc]

Well...the Run occurred today. Fantastic weather and a pretty good turn out.

 

http://i15.photobucket.com/albums/a354/mjohnson555/seats/Fish%20and%20Chip%20Run%20May%202010/DSC_2892_edited-1.jpg

 

http://i15.photobucket.com/albums/a354/mjohnson555/seats/Fish%20and%20Chip%20Run%20May%202010/DSC_2889_edited-1.jpg

 

http://i15.photobucket.com/albums/a354/mjohnson555/seats/Fish%20and%20Chip%20Run%20May%202010/DSC_2886_edited-1.jpg

[Croc]

We even managed to set up a panorama in the local park. Somehow a Miata snuck in LOL

 

http://i15.photobucket.com/albums/a354/mjohnson555/seats/Fish%20and%20Chip%20Run%20May%202010/FishchipdriveMay2010panorama.jpg

 

 

In case you cannot see it all here is the photobucket link.

 

http://i15.photobucket.com/albums/a354/mjohnson555/seats/Fish%20and%20Chip%20Run%20May%202010/FishchipdriveMay2010panorama.jpg

 

The route was inspired - lots and lots of twisty stuff. I need to copy it and send it to Bruce for the Se7ens run in June.

[BruceBowker]

Nice to see all those cars together.

 

Bruce.