A Few Thoughts on Drinking and Driving this Holiday Season

[scannon]

Please take care of yourself over the holidays. A recent joint study conducted by the Department of Health and the Department of Motor Vehicles indicates that 23% of traffic accidents are alcohol related. This means that the remaining 77% are caused by the assholes who drink bottled water, Starbucks, soda, juice, energy drinks and shit like that. Therefore, beware of those who do not drink alcohol. They cause three times as many accidents. This message is sent to you by someone who is a drinker and worries about your safety. And, watch out for those designated drivers!

 

 

I would like to share an experience with you about drinking and driving. As you well know, some of us have been known to have had brushes with

the authorities on our way home from the odd social session over the years. Well, I have done something about it:

 

A couple of nights ago I was out for a few drinks with some pals and had a few too many whiskeys as well as beers and some rather nice claret; but knowing full well I may have been slightly over the limit, I did something I've never done before - I took a bus home. I arrived back safely and without incident which was a real surprise, since I had never driven a city bus before and am not sure where I got this one.

 

 

I'm passing this on because it worked for me today. A Dr. on TV said to have inner peace we should always finish things we start & we all could use more calm in our lives. I looked around my house to find things I'd started & hadn't finished, so I finished off a bottle of Merlot, a bottle of Chardonnay, a bodle of Baileys, a butle of wum, tha mainder of Valiuminun scriptins, an a box a chocletz. Yu haf no idr how fablus I feel rite now. Sned this to all who need inner piss. An telum u luvum

[Croc]

:rofl:

[lancylad]

That was FUNNY....thanks for the chuckle...

[jimrankin]

What Scannon said about drinking saving you is TRUE! I was standing at a bus stop the other night after leaving my favorite "watering hole", a bit worse for ware. I saw a bus approaching at a pretty high speed and took my hand off the bus stop pole I had been hanging onto to wave it down as the driver, who was not even in uniform, did not apper to have seen me, or much else. Luckily for me I was saved by alcohol as having let go of the bus pole I had no other support, lost my balance and fell backwards into the shelter, luckily landing on the bench just in time to watch the bus take out the pole I had been moments before holding onto. If I had been sober I would probably be dead right now. I've learned a valuable lesson from this incident and will never in the future wait at a bus stop sober.